New Tomboy


Part Five


By Philip Weigel


The Disclaimer is in the first two parts.


_______________________________________________________________________


"Oooo," Akane said. "What hit me?" Curiously enough, it had felt quite soothing, not something that "hit" her.


"Megido Flare," the Mage supplied helpfully. "It's mainly for exorcising weaker ghosts and demons, but it also calms down mortals."


"It's the only reason she's still alive," someone said. It took a while for Akane to recognize the speaker as Ukyou. Akane blinked and scanned up and down the table. Still somewhat calm and somewhat more rational than the situation she had woken up in had rendered her earlier.


As Nabiki saw Akane waking up she ducked for cover.


"What the $#%?" one of the rats she was hiding behind said.


"Shhh," Nabiki responded desperately. Moshia looked at the odd sight and back at Lydia.


"There's, like, a Werecat hiding behind us," Moisha said.


"This has to be a dream," Lydia said. "A crazy $#%^&$in' mixed up dream."


As she considered the sheer magnitude of the situation it became obvious that this was probably not (partially) Ranma's fault.


"Now Akane," Kasumi said. "You might want to sit down for this."


"Err...I am sitting down Kasumi,' Akane said. That made her nervous. "What's wrong?"


"Well...depending on how you look at it..." Kasumi hesitated again. "Nothing's wrong!" She was trying to put a cheerful spin on it.


"I woke up as a rat after screwing two girls and a guy I'd never met before," Akane said. "There's a lot wrong."


"Well..." Kasumi said.


"Oh for goodness sake," Ukyou shouted. "Just tell her!"


"Tell me what?" Akane asked.


"You're pregnant, Tendo," Kodachi snapped back.


All three of the fiancée brigade was quite frustrated. All three of them, even had a strong sense of honor, twisted though it might be in some cases. And the fact that Ranma had gotten a girl pregnant meant, as far as they were concerned, that the chase was over. They weren't going to like it though.


"I'm...." Akane seemed to lose the ability to speak.


Akane just couldn't believe what she had just been told. However, as soon as she looked at the male Wererat, she knew exactly what she was going to do.


"NEZUMI NO BAKA!!!" Was the battle cry. However, Gar was able to grab hold of her before she did anything that could hurt, maim, or send Romeo flying. "LET ME GO! I MUST KILL HIM!!!"


Romeo whimpered. This was not going well at all. Worse of all, "I can't believe I'm going to be a father..."


"Hey Romes, I've been, like, meaning to ask you. Can I be your children's 'auntie Moisha'?"


Akane stopped as soon as she heard that. "Hold it... What do you mean children?"


"Don't you know? Wererats are the 'breeder' of all Werefolk. We have children in $%&#in' litters. But you might be 'lucky'. Bein' originally human, you might only be carrying one right now." Lydia cleared up for Akane.


Akane whimpered a few moments. Her sadness then gave way to a new rush of anger, and she broke Gar's hold on her. "ROMEO NO BAKA!" Was the cry of vengeance as Akane then took off towards Romeo.


"Oh crud!" Romeo cried as he got to his feet. The scene that followed was that of Akane chasing Romeo around the koi pond numerous times. "Helpmesavemehelpmesavemehelpmesavemehelpmesaveme!!!" was Romeo's cry throughout the entire ordeal.


"Wow..." Ranma commented. "That boy sure can run."


"Oh my... Perhaps I should get the first aid kit ready for him?" Kasumi said, as she applying a cold compress to the unconscious Tirga's head.


However, the backyard was once again engulfed in light. There was now a group of three people, another female Werecheetah, a tiger-like man, and a Werelion.


"Hey guys! What took so long Britanny?" Gina asked.


"Oh, nothing much." Britanny said, a slight strain to her voice. "Just the usual stuff, like finding out I slept with two guys, and I'm pregnant, and I have no clue who the father is yet..."


"Join the club." Gina said. Both Gina and Britanny sighed.


Sheila blinked. "Woah, Britanny too? I'm guessing Strype was one of the guys, but who was the other?"


Coughing lightly, Gar blushed a deep shade of red. "That would be me..."


Staring at her brother in shock for a moment, Sheila could only say one thing. "Damn..." After a few moments to gain her wits, Sheila added, "Well, it could have been worse, right?" Gar just groaned in response. "That bad huh?"


Deciding to make it easier for Gar, Onoli spoke up. "When it was over, I saw Gar in a grouping with Britanny, Strype Carla, Luan, and Charlotte."


Looking at her brother, Sheila said, "Damn, not even I was that bad..."


It was at this point, that Romeo was trying to climb Britanny. "PLEASE, YOU GOTTA SAVE ME, THERE'S THIS RABID WERERAT AND.." It was then Romeo realized whom he was climbing. "Oh, hell..."


Grabbing Romeo by the scruff of his neck, Britanny looked him directly in the eyes as she raised him to her eye level. "Okay you, I don't know what's going, on and if you don't tell me, I am so going to kick you tail from here to..."


"Britanny!" Theo interrupted. "Put the poor boy down. We know you are under stress but so is everyone here. Do not try to make things worse." Then looking at Akane, Theo added, "And that goes for you too Ms. Tendo."


Sighing Britanny put Romeo back down onto his feet. "You got lucky."


"Hey Brit, you won't believe this!" Raphiel said.


"What?" Britanny asked. She then turned her head to the direction Raphiel was pointing, and she saw it. "MORE WERECHEETAHS!?"


"Did the jackass change you too?" Ukyo asked.


Blinking, Britanny replied, "No. I was born a Werecheetah."


"Fake Ranma is really stupid." Shampoo said.


"Please stop calling me 'Fake Ranma', okay?" Raphiel asked Shampoo nicely, only to receive a glare from the Amazon-turned-Werecheetah.


Looking at Sheila, Britanny asked, "So, how're you doing Sheila?"


"Okay I guess..." Sheila said. "I'm kind of in the same boat as you..."


Blinking, Britanny asked, "You slept with two guys too?"


Shaking her head, Sheila answered. "Just one guy. And one girl... Well, the point is, I'm now pregnant too."


Looking over at the male Jagwere who was sitting next to Sheila, Britanny asked him, "Are you the guy that..."


"Yes..." Ranma said. "The name's Ranma. Ranma Saotome."


"Pleased to meet you. Name's Britanny Diggers. And you better treat Sheila right."


"I will, no question about that." Ranma said, pointing slightly to Gar who was pounding one fist into an open palm.


"I take it this means Sheila will need maternity leave then." Onoli said.


Thinking for a moment, Britanny then asked, "Well, since we've figured out what's been going on, how about we find the perpetrators that did this all to us and kick their asses?"


"Violence doesn't solve anything Brit." Strype said.


********


Nodoka knocked on the Tendo door and was surprised a few moments later when a tall, very tall, tiger-striped girl answered the door.


"Oh!" Kasumi said. "Auntie Saotome, how good of you to come."


"Ka...Kasumi-chan?" Nodoka asked curiously. "Is that you?"


"Oh yes," Kasumi said. "There were some interesting developments last night."


********


After a long explanation, Nodoka frowned.


"I suppose I must handle my unmanly husband later," Nodoka said. "For now I would assume that it is most important to deal with other issues." She paused for a long moment...


"Of course," Nodoka said finally. "The only honorable thing to do is for the fathers to marry the mothers."


At this point, Ranma noticed he was being glared at on two fronts. He decided to weigh his options carefully.


To his left he could see all the fiancées glaring at him with their Cheetah eyes. They were eyes that promised pain for him screwing them all over, (not literally, which is WHY they are upset) if he agreed, which he would have to anyway.


To his right, he could see Gar glaring at him. The stare was one that was burrowing down into his soul. It was one that practically screamed, 'If you abandon my sister, I am going to hunt you down, skin you alive, and make you into a fancy coat.' Who was Ranma to argue with that?


"I can agree with that." Ranma said. Looking at Sheila, just so he wouldn't have to look at the fiancées, he smiled at her. "Who knows, I might make a good father."


Sheila couldn't help but smile. She leaned over and hugged Ranma, who returned the hug.


"Aw... How sweet!" Both Britanny and Gina said. Britanny then leaned over and hugged Strype, who couldn't help but smile.


Looking at Julia, Romeo asked, "Do I have to lean over and hug her?" He said as he pointed to Akane.


"BITE ME!" Akane said in retaliation.


"I think that's, like, part of the reason you're in the situation you are." Moisha added.


Everyone turned as a sound from the stairs could be heard. Two forms then came downstairs; both had clothing that seemed, 'disheveled'.


"And here come the two that caused all this..." Ranma said. He couldn't help but notice how many people got weapons ready.


"Ahh, good morning everyone, and an excellent morning it is, eh Saotome?" Soun said in a very choreographed voice.


Nodding his head, Genma answered, "Yes Tendo, a wonderful morning after a night spent as far away from each as possible and doing very...." He then blinked as he saw Nodoka standing before him poker-faced. "Oh, hello dear..." He squeaked out.


"Dear..." Nodoka said, a hint of venom to her voice. "I believe you have some explaining to do... Specifically, as to WHY you used such an artifact to get Ranma and Akane together.


Blinking, Genma said, "You know!?" Blinking again, he then smiled. "GREAT! This must mean that the plan still worked and that Akane and Ranma are now..."


"That did not happen dear!" Nodoka said, starting to unsheathe her katana. "As you can see..." Nodoka said, stepping out of the way, allowing Soun and Genma to see what their plan has wrought. However, Genma took what he saw another way. He went over to Ranma and grabbed Ranma, bringing him to his feet.


"BOY, YOU DID IT!" Genma said, patting Ranma's shoulders. "YOU MASTERED THE NEKO-KEN!"


"Uh, not exactly pops..." Ranma said.


It was then Genma took a better look at everyone, seeing a lot of Werecats, and a few Wererats, some that looked VERY familiar. "What happened?"


"The spread of Lycanthrope Pops. Now I'm a Werejaguar since I slept with one. And on top of that I got HER pregnant, NOT Akane."


"WHAT!?" Genma and Soun asked.


"Say hello to my new fiancée. Sheila." Ranma said, motioning towards Sheila, who couldn't help but blush at the implication that Ranma had no problem thinking of her that way.


"But... The schools... You have to marry Akane!" Soun said.


"Sorry, but she should marry the father of her children." Nodoka said, motioning towards Romeo.


"Um... Hello?" Romeo said sheepishly. Looking at Soun, he asked, "Should I take the name Tendo, or should Akane take the name of Ellis?"


"I'M NOT GONNA MARRY THAT PERVERT!" Akane said. It was then Soun realized that his daughter was now a Wererat.


"Look at it this way sis..." Kasumi said, causing Soun and Genma's jaws to drop further, seeing she was a Weretiger. "You always said you hate boys."


"And you’re in luck." Nabiki said. "This one comes with two girls!"


"Hey, since when are we part of a %$@#in' package deal?" Lydia asked.


At this point, Soun broke down crying.


Genma whimpered. "This can't get worse..."


"Actually..." Ranma said as he cracked his knuckles. "There's a lot for you to answer for."


Britanny smiled and unsheathed her claws. "I'm just itching to try out my claws on some panda steak." Sure her claws are useless because she didn't keep a good diet. But Soun and Genma don't know that.


"We just have to remember to bring them back to the others after Brit." Gina said. "I'm sure they'll want a turn as well." Britanny nodded as the beat-down commenced.


(----)


"Okay," Lydia signed. "While they're beating up the old men, let's make a break for it."


"But...what about that girl?" Romeo signed back.


"Like, deal with your mess later, Romes," Moisha signed. "Survival now."


That said the Wererats started to sneak out of the building, when they noticed something.


"Hey! What the $%#$ are you still doing here?" Lyds asked the Werejaguar in their midsts nervously.


"Hiding from my sister," Nabiki said. "Before she remembers I slept with Ranma and I don't have a baby to endanger."


"But you're a cat," Romeo said confused. "Why are you afraid of a rat?"


"Think about how you woke up this morning," Nabiki answered. The rats twitched.


"Well, you ain't comin' with us," Lydia snapped back. "No cats, and we're..."


"You three are not going anywhere," Julia Diggers said firmly. "Except back to your seats."


"Right...I was just saying that," Romeo said. "Back to our seats."


"And how do you $#%#$% plan to stop us..." Lydia was interrupted by a palm strike to the face driving her nose back into her skull.


"Now," Julia said, picking up the suddenly limp Lydia. "While she heals, will the rest of you follow me?"


"Uh...Yes..." the rats answered.


"I'll be on the roof," Nabiki said silently.


Julia nodded at that and set Lydia back at the table and tried to keep her face from falling into the soup. At least her heart had started up again, shouldn't be too long before she healed from that little deathblow.


"Here, Raphiel," Julia said. "Could you make sure she doesn't hurt herself or something?"


"Oh sure," Raphiel said cheerfully, which is how Lydia ended up in his lap. Fortunately for him, the ex-fiancées were busy beating on Genma and Soun so they couldn't see further proof of his playboy status.